Is it difficult to hear a critique of your parenting skills? When I had my first child (almost 13 years ago), I was convinced I knew how to take care of a baby. I read books and watched programs, so there was nothing anyone could say that would be more effective than what I was already doing.
When my daughter was just a few weeks old, I read and heard from the pediatrician that it was not necessary to bathe the baby every single day, so I followed that recommendation. While I washed my baby daily, I didn’t give her a bath every day. Boy oh boy my mom and mother-in-law had a field day with that one. They thought I was crazy, because in all of their years of raising children they had never heard of such a thing. They urged me to bathe the baby every day. I gave in that time. Little did I know, that was just the beginning of the countless instructions I would receive over the years on how to raise my girls.
A recent conversation brought this back up for me. A friend questioned whether or not to say something to a relative who she felt was neglecting their child. My response was yes, because our priority has to be to the child and not the parent’s ego. Another friend gave me permission to discipline her child as I would my own, if I see her misbehaving. There are some parents who struggle with the idea of someone else telling them how to raise their children or even telling their children what to do. I know it can depend, however, on how the advice is delivered and the motives behind it. To some it also depends on who is offering up the suggestions. Is it someone without children; is it a nosy neighbor or a loving grandparent? I am not afraid to admit that I am not a perfect parent and I don’t always know the right thing to do. I am still learning this parenting thing as I go, but I am open to listening, when I know it benefits my children.
